Engagement Gift Etiquette: Modern Rules for Gifting Right

Why Engagement Gifts Still Matter (Even Today)

Because your gift should be as thoughtful as the proposal

Why Engagement Gift Etiquette Has Changed

Engagement gifts aren't what they used to be. Gone are the days when they were limited to toasters or a surprise spot on a department store registry. In 2025, engagement gifting is all about meaning. Less about price tags, and more about personality. More curated, more thoughtful, and definitely more fun.

Today’s couples often don’t follow traditional gift registries. Many already live together, have the essentials, or prefer something sentimental. That means the rules around engagement gifting have loosened — but that also means we’ve got a bit more to think about when choosing what to give (and how to give it).

👉 Read the full guide to modern engagement gifting.

Do You Have to Bring a Gift to an Engagement Party?

Short answer: not always. Long answer: depends on the vibe, your relationship with the couple, and the type of celebration.

If it’s a formal party and you’re close with the couple — think sibling, best mate, or part of the bridal party — a gift is absolutely the done thing. But if it’s a low-key picnic and you’re a distant cousin or work friend, a card, a hug, or a bottle of bubbles might be just right.

🏱 Rule of thumb: If you’re asking “should I bring a gift?”… bring one. A thoughtful gesture is never out of place.

👉 If you’re not sure, here’s our take on what to bring to an engagement party.

How Much Should You Spend on an Engagement Gift?

This is the big one — and one that causes the most anxiety.

The truth? There’s no strict number. Engagement gifting isn’t like a wedding with a price-per-head mindset. That said, here’s a general guideline for Aussie givers:

💡 More important than cost? Thought. A personalised bottle of wine with a heartfelt message beats an expensive gift with no soul, every time.

👉 Check out our no-stress spending guide for engagement gifts.

What Counts as a Thoughtful Gift in 2025?

Modern etiquette leans toward meaning over material. A great engagement gift doesn’t just say “congrats,” it shows you see the couple. It reflects their vibe, relationship, and future.

Personalised alcohol with their names or engagement date
Keepsakes that look good and last (like engraved glassware)
Shared experiences — wine tastings, cooking classes, weekend escapes
Curated gift boxes full of locally sourced goodies, chocolates, candles, and luxe accessories

👉 Not sure what to pick? Browse our thoughtful engagement gift ideas.

Gifting for Second Marriages or Older Couples

Navigating etiquette for second-time newlyweds or mature couples? You’ll want to lean more into personal, less into tradition. Think shared experiences, luxe essentials, or gifts that reflect where they are in life.

👉 Thoughtful ideas for second marriages and older couples.

Should You Give as a Couple or Solo?

If you’re attending with your partner, it’s perfectly normal (and often expected) to give a joint gift. It also lets you go in on something a little more luxe.

A curated celebration gift box with champagne and luxe add-ons
A set of personalised glassware
A shared experience, like a couple’s massage or wine tasting day

💬 Pro tip: Don’t forget to sign both your names on the card — nobody likes mystery gift givers.

Writing the Perfect Note

Whether it’s a physical card or a message in a delivery box, what you say matters. Avoid clichés and aim for something personal.

👉 Here’s how to write the perfect note for an engagement gift.

Gifting Faux Pas to Avoid

🚫 Generic merch – Mugs that say “Mr. Right” and “Mrs. Always Right”? Let’s move on.
🚫 Over-personalising – If you’re not super close, skip the deep sentimental stuff like photo books or inside jokes.
🚫 Cold cash – Unless it’s culturally expected or explicitly requested, money in a card can feel a bit impersonal.

When and How to Give Your Gift

Bringing it to the party? Wrap it beautifully, pop on a tag, and hand it over before the speeches.
Not attending? Send it beforehand or within a week after. Include a warm note that shows you’re thinking of them.
Gift too big or fragile? Opt for direct delivery. Many stores (like us!) offer shipping straight to their door, beautifully packed and ready to impress.

Final Thoughts: The New Rules Are Yours to Write

Modern engagement gift etiquette isn’t about rules — it’s about thoughtful decisions. If you’ve chosen something meaningful, wrapped it with care, and given it with heart — you’ve done it right.

🎉 Whether it’s a $30 bottle or a $200 experience, it’s about making the couple feel seen and celebrated.

💌 Ready to nail your next gift? Start with a personalised box or build your own gift today.